After you drop her off, you hear kidz argue
“Unamanga lena emlethe izolo it was A GTI lena i i R-Line ned Zimhlophe zoy2
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Did u know?
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Umsuzo unaka njengama simba.
so make usuza usuke usinyela yazi
I don’t care anymore, about anything or anyone. Nothing interests me, I don’t react to all the shit that’s going on around me. I feel my self alone, so alone that I cannot hear but the bustle of thoughts, chaos and mess in my head even while being with a bunch of people. They think I’m just a weird person, quiet and psycho that has nothing with the graduate world, judging my silence and lack of contact with them .. I knew so many people and I saw in each one of them how much they’re fake, I saw hypocrisy and selfishness .. I’ve been through many situations, life thought me not to trust, not to depend on anyone, . I learned to be strong and to repair m’y broken pieces
We have yet another set of Army Worms preparing to attack Men’s wallets and Bank accounts on the 14th of February. Advise from the Office of The Vice President Disaster Management and Mitigation Unit is for Men to use the strongest pesticide i.e Switching off your phones and change location._
A man and his wife came home drunk and went to sleep.
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So you scrolling for what cause I said they went to sleep.??
Do you want to wake them up?
*Ladies, If you play your man like a football,
another woman will catch him like a goalkeeper,
you will regret watching the highlights*
Shortest conversation I have ever had with a woman:
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Me: Ithin iNumber yakho
Her : Ayisho lutho, why?
Nyaa came from school and dancing.
His father wondered what made so happy and decided to ask.
Dad : Son I have never seen you in this mood for a
while now…..any good news u want to share?
Nyaa : Dad next year you won’t be buying any textbook, notebooks and writing materials…..
Dad : That’s my son, why …. did you win a Scholarship?
Nyaa : No! Dad I’m repeating the same class
A man at work calls home and his 8 years old daughter picks the phone:
“Hi honey, this is daddy. Is mommy near the phone?”
“No daddy she is upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul.” The little girl quipped.
“After a brief pause daddy says, “But honey you haven’t got an uncle Paul!”
“Oh yes I do, and he is upstairs in the room with mommy right now.”
Brief pause,“ Uh okay then, this is what I want you to do: put the phone down on the table, run upstairs, knock on the bedroom door, and shout to mommy that daddy’s car has just arrived at the gate.”
“Ok daddy just a minute….”
A while later the little girl comes back to the phone, “Done it daddy.
””What happened honey?”
“Well, mommy got scared and jumped out of the bed naked, ran round the room screaming, tripped over, and knocked her head on the staircase ,now she is not moving at all.”
“What about Uncle Paul?” asked Dad. He jumped out the window into the swimming pool, but I guess he didn’t know you emptied the water last week. He hit the bottom and I think he’s dead.”
After a really long pause this time… Daddy says, “Swimming pool, but we don’t have a swimming pool! Is this 486-5731?”
“No, this is 486-5713” “Sorry wrong number….!!!!”
The story behind “ladies first”:
Long ago, a man ‘n woman were madly in love.They wanted to get married but their parents didn’t approve.So they decided to kill themselves.They thought the best way to do it was to leap off a cliff…The man couldn’t bare to see his sweetheart fall before him.. so he convinced her he would go first, and he jumped..
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But that bitch never did..