The pain that girls feel when they give birth is the same pain we (boys) feel when they say ”I can’t come out im already sleeping see u tomorrow…

My son is turning 2 years today but due to budget
we are not telling him

Examining a female patient brutally beaten by her husband, Doctor tells her: “Your heart, lungs, pulse, BP are fine. Now let me see that cute little thing which gets you ladies into all kinds of trouble.”
The woman immediately starts taking off her skirt and underwear.
The doctor shocked said: “No! No! Please! Put on your clothes! Just show me your tongue!”

Wife to her husband text*:
“Big head, you haven’t called me since morning…Are you the only one working in that office? Smh! Fine, continue…”

Side Chic text:
“Babes, you haven’t called today, I guess you’ve been busy with work. I hope you’ve had time to eat something at least. Don’t overwork yourself my love. I will call you later.
I Love you!”

Now do the mathematics yourself, it’s not juju they use in snatching your husbands , is it?

A married woman entered a Pharmacy, she walked to the Pharmacist looked straight into his eyes and said: ‘I would like to buy FAST KILLING POISON FOR HUMANS’.
The bewildered Pharmacist asked: ‘Why, what for? The lady replied: ‘I need it to poison my husband’.
The Pharmacist shouted: ‘Lord have mercy, it’s against the law! It’s a sin.’
Absolutely not! shouted the lady. She reached into her bag and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the Pharmacist’s wife.
The pharmacist looked at the picture and screamed: ‘Why didn’t you tell me you had a Prescription….

Poor countries have the longest National anthems because they explain all their problems in it!

Donald Trump

I have a girlfriend who is a police officer. When she misses me, she just come to my house in uniform and arrest me in presence of my wife and take me to her home till the next day.

Then she bring me back and tell my wife “we are not done with investigations yet. I shall pick him up anytime we want more from him“

And my innocent wife will always say: ‘madam officer, God bless you for handling my husband’s case with care I will make sure he is always available anytime you need him”. Share & enjoy your day as you put smile on somebody’s face also.