A sweet grandmother Telephoned St. Joseph’s Hospital. She timidly asked, “Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?” The operator said, “I’ll be glad to help, dear. What’s the name and room number of the patient?” The grandmother in her weak, tremulous voice said, Norma Findlay, Room 302.”
The operator replied, “Let me put you on hold while I check with the nurse’s station for that room.”After a few minutes, the operator returned to the phone and said, “I have good news. Her nurse just told me that Norma is doing well. Her blood pressure is fine; her blood work just came back normal and her Physician, Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged tomorrow.” The grandmother said, “Thank you. That’s wonderful. I was so worried. God bless you for the good News.” The operator replied, “You’re more than welcome. Is Norma your daughter?” The grandmother said, “No, I’m Norma Findlay in Room 302. No one tells me anything.”
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Little Jack was filling a hole in the garden when his neighbour looked over the fence and asked, “What are you doing here, son?” “I’ve just buried my goldfish; it died” replied Little Jack tearfully. “That is a mighty large hole you dug for a goldfish” said the neighbour.Patting down the last bit of earth, Little Jack said, “That’s because my goldfish is inside your stupid cat !”
A magician worked on a cruise ship. The audience was different each week, so the magician did the same tricks over and over again. There was one problem. The captain’s parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician did every trick. Once he understood, he started shouting in the middle of the show “Look, it’s not the same hat!” or, “Look, he’s hiding the flowers under the table,” or “Hey, all the cards the ace of spades?” The magician was furious, but couldn’t do anything. It was, after all, the captain’s parrot. Then the ship sank. The magician found himself on a piece of wood in the middle of the sea with, as fate would have it, the parrot. They stared at each other with hatred, but did not utter a word. This went on for a day and then another and then another.
Finally on the fourth day, the parrot could not hold back and said,
“OK, I give up. Where’s the ship?”
Its only in black families were you will find
a Seven years old uncle
Protitutes are the only people
who are telling the truth when saying
”It was a pleasure doing business with you”
The rest are just pure liers
Parents a confusing sometimes
They will beat so that you cry and then beat you so you keep quiet
A girl was dreaming in that dream somebody shot her and she died, when she arrive in heaven god said to her “oh my child u don’t deserve to be here, I will give u a chance to live again bt u gonna return on earth as a pregnant chicken” then she went back to earth by that time is was time for her to lay egg, she went under a tree, she pushed 1st egg came out,she pushed again the 2nd egg came out and she pushed harder for the 3rd time then her husband woke her up shouting “dikeledi” “dikeledi” “o kakela dikobo (You’ shitting on the blanket) sies man!!
She – Hi I Am Sonia
Me – So ?
She – Nia
Some ladies draw their eyebrows too high..
‘ they look surprised the whole day
When you finally think you found the one…
.
Waiter: Would you like to eat something
sir?
Him: Nah thanks
Waiter: You madam?
Her: Bring two nah thanks and water
please