Never run after a bus or a girl.
There will always be another one.

I’m not actually this tall.
I am sitting on my wallet.

Two single boys living away from home were talking among each other….

First -: “have you ever used a ‘ Recipe-book ‘ to make cooking..??”

The second boy :- “brought two-three, but the first step of making any recipe is the most difficult..!!”

First boy :- “which one..??”

Second boy :- *”take a clean pot..!!”*

A man wakes up with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.
He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean.
So is the rest of the house.
He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table. ‘Honey, breakfast is on the table, I left early to go grocery shopping. Love You!’

Totally shocked with the note, he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is already at the table, eating. He asks, ‘Son, what happened last night?’

His son says, ‘Well, you came home around 3 AM, drunk and delirious. Broke some crockery, puked in the hall, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door’. Confused, the man asks, ‘So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me? I should expect a big quarrel with her!’

His son replies, ‘Oh, that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your clothes n shoes off, you said, ‘LADY LEAVE ME ALONE! I’M MARRIED!’

*Moral*
Saying the right thing while drunk – *PRICELESS*

Dear baby mama
You are allowed to call your baby dad at 03:00 am
and tell him his baby is dreaming

Her : baby I’m pregnant

Skebhe : so tell me ,why you changed your name ?

Her : baby I’m pregnant serious

Skebhe : eh! and your surname too

Skebhe : Doctor I have a problem of forgetting things so easy

Doctor : when was that problem started?

Skebhe : Which problem ?

Sdumo : Do you think a woman can turn you a millionaire ?

Skebhe : yes only if you are a billionaire