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*When you were born, your mother spent
hours giving birth to you; you thanked her by
crying every night in the middle of her sleep

*When you were 4; your mother bought you
ice- cream; you thanked her by dropping it
all over the floor

*When you were 6; your mother used to
drive you to school; you thanked her by
closing the car door and not even
looking back

*When you were 10; your mother paid for
music lessons; you thanked her for not even
bothering to practice

*When you were 12; your mother paid for
summer camp; you thanked her by not even
writing one single letter

*When you were 13; your mother took you
and your freinds to the movies; you thanked
her by asking her to sit on a different row

*When you were 15; your mother was
waiting for an important phone call; you
thanked her by being on the phone all day

*When you were 17; your mother cried on
your graduation day; you thanked her by
partying out with your freinds all night; and
not even phoning her to tell her that you are
okay

*When you were 18; your mother carried all
your bags and stuff to your college campus;
you thanked her by telling her to go away as
you was embarrassed in front of your friends

*When you were 20; you got married and
your mother cried of happiness on your
wedding; you thanked her by moving half way
across the country & not bothering to keep in
touch

*When you were 30; your mother was old
and asked you to take care of her you
thanked her by telling her that shes annoying
and old people should stop being such a
pressure on their children

*Then suddenly one day; your mother quitely
died; and everthing that you didn’t do came
rushing back and hit you like a crash of
thunder on your heart

Cherish and respect your mother while you
have the chance…
You will come to Cry when she is Gone. Others were not lucky enough to spend many years with their mothers.

Remember: we only have one mom.

Kindly press LIKE & write,”I LOVE U MOM” if
you are proud of her



How to survive January

1) date a taxi driver for free ride to work

2) attend each and every funeral in your hood for a free plate

3) borrow meat from your neighbours and make soup and take it back

4) stay away from broke girls or niggas even he/she is your xondile

5) use one teabags at least 3× before you throw it away

6) use a taxi to work and save petrol

7) mix water with sugar to make a drink

8) try to use prostitutes for sexual needs to avoid imali yekhanda and unnecessary use of money

First year Students at University of Amahlanya la engifunda khona, were receiving their first anatomy class, on the surgery table was a dead cow.

They gathered around the table. The professor started the class by telling them, ” in Veterinary medicine it is necessary to have two important qualities as a Vet doctor: The first is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the animal body.” For example
, The Professor stuck his finger in the anus of the dead cow, withdrew it and stuck his finger in his mouth – “mhh… low on fibre” he said.

“Go ahead and do the same thing, “He told his students. The student freaked out, hesitant but went ahead and eventually took turns sticking a finger in the anal opening of the dead cow and sucking it very disgusted but most murmuring the same conclusion, “yes… low on fibre”.

When everyone had finished, the professor looked at them and said “While I can’t fault you in your methods to diagnose low fibre, the second most important quality of a Vet Doctor is the power of observation, if you had observed carefully, I stuck in my middle finger and sucked my index finger. Now learn to pay attention otherwise you will eat a lot of crap in my class.

Make sure your friends pay attention today

Imagine ukhaphe i-Cherry yakho to fetch her child from her baby daddy’s house
& after an hour of waiting at the gate, he calls & say;
“Ungahamba broe bathi bayalala”.


One Day A Man Was Driving Fast, And He Got Pulled Over By A Police Officer.

Officer: “What’s Your Excuse For Going Over The Speed Limit?”

Man In Hurry: “I’m Sorry Officer, But It’s A Matter Of Life And Death”

Officer: “What Do You Mean”

Man: “You See Officer, There’s A Woman Waiting For My At My House And I Have To Go To Her”

Officer: “That’s Not A Death Matter”

Man: “It Will Be, If My Wife Gets There First“

A Man Was Going In His Ferrari Suddenly Had An Accident.

The Car Was Totally Wrecked But Some How The Man Was Safe.

Policemen Arrives

Man Cried: “Officer, My Brand New Car.”

Officer: “You Are Such A Materialistic Sir, You Even Haven’t Notice That Your Left Arm Has Been Cut Off.”

Man Looks At His Left Arm And Yells: “Oh My God! My Rolex Watch.“


Dress Code For A Party Is “Black Ties Only“.

Santa Goes For The Party & Is Surprised To See That The Other Guests Are Wearing Suits Also.


LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP
uthi u busy wena ujola nesthombe

Muntu bamfaka ngama back door

Uduke ethekwini uze ubuze komama abadayisayo ukuth
“senike nangbona yin ngdlula la?”